There is a continuous balance between your external and internal phase, or doing and being, or your yin and your yang. I often feel it as an ongoing switch between me being either in Student-mode or in Teacher-mode. Last year I started living more in sync with nature’s cycles; I took a long holiday to ‘hibernate’ in December, I’m naturally syncing my menstruation with the phases of the moon, and I made Spring my time for new beginnings with omniwonder. The more I’m … Read More
Every intensity, or ‘overexcitability’, associated with giftedness is not necessarily negative or positive in itself. Many people who evaluate their traits, however, see them strictly as negatives or even weaknesses. I don’t just believe that all have their good sides, I also believe it’s important to know these sides and develop them into valuable strengths. It’s much easier to see your imperfections than your strengths, so I made an overview of the 5 overexcitabilities and how they can be both positive, negative, and neutral. … Read More
Following my interview with Jo last week, I’ve been getting a lot of requests to go deeper into the story of growing up gifted. Of the three words that perfectly describe a gifted person; intense, complex, and driven, my intensity has always been the biggest struggle. I have painful memories at the dinner table being told to talk less or at least talk slower. It was said with love, but it hurt, because of my burning desire to share an idea or … Read More
As I was doing research for the article on the second Foundation of Happiness, living in the present moment, I was dreading writing it more and more, until realized I couldn’t do it. Why?! It turned out to be a valuable lesson in authenticity.
As I mentioned in my previous post, I believe happiness builds on three foundations: gratitude, non-attachment, and living in the present moment. Gratitude is a very direct tool that works wonders when it comes to working on a positive attitude, and I’ve never come across anything drug-free in my life that is a faster fix for happy feelings. Therefore, gratitude is where I always recommend my clients to begin.
I am convinced that, to some extent, happiness is a choice. What this means is that happiness is an inside job, as it always comes from within. Even if your happy feelings seem to be due to an outer source or event, this is not really the case. Happiness is a state of internal fulfillment. Instead, we often tell ourselves that when we achieve this or acquire that, we will be happy.
Because emotionality and sensitivity are frequently looked down upon, while their opposing character traits are heavily romanticized in the Western world, people often have a disturbed image of their own emotional behavior. We are constantly under pressure to restrain our emotional selves. We have been taught to apologize for our feelings, to be ashamed about our tears, and to fear being called hysterical or dramatic. But if you immediately discard your feelings as a weakness, how will you gain understanding … Read More
To test your open-mindedness, let me ask you a question. Imagine that I were to show you a picture of an angry and intimidating looking Arab guy with a big beard. What do you think? What is the first thing that comes to your mind? Is it the word ‘terrorist’? If the first thing that came to mind is something along those lines, that’s okay. What?! When I say that that’s okay, I mean that it’s not your fault. This … Read More
Every evening, minus a few exceptions, the first thing I do when I get in bed is write in my gratitude journal. I take a couple of minutes to answer questions about my happiness such as ‘what am I grateful for?’, ‘what did I do great today?’, and ‘what amazing things happened today?’. It’s something that I absolutely love doing, and it has provided me with more benefits that I initially could imagine. I don’t believe in quick fixes … Read More
I recently had a delightful conversation about taking small steps with Megan Karlen, who got me to contemplate her words to the point where I just had to write it down. As we were discussing business strategies and ways to keep oneself sane and zen, she told me of a trip to the mountains she’d recently taken. Encouraged by others to come along, she resistantly climbed the steady slope, cursing the thin air and her protesting muscles. Struggling to keep … Read More